(Mathilda) I met Roland in a dive bar, he was crying in his beer.
I said, "Mister, if you need to talk I'll gladly lend an ear."
He said, (Roland) "You seem sweet but I don't think that I should share my tale
for I'm fearful that my storytelling will land me in jail."
(Mathilda) I said, "That's just fine, I sympathize, I've got my secrets too
for I'm fleeing from my past, I'm running from the law like you.
My transgression was a crime of passion, folk don't understand.
Now I'm wanted back in Kansas for the death of my old man...
I promised him I'd love him and only him for all his life,
and I did until I came home early on that fateful night
when I caught him in the bedroom cheating on me with some bitch,
so I grabbed a knife and stabbed 'em both and dumped them in a ditch."
(violin solo)
(Roland) I met Mathilda in the strangest way one night out drinking.
She took one look at me and summed up just what I was thinking.
She said, (Mathilda) "I know that we're strangers but we both have troubled minds
and there's blood under your fingernails and murder in your eyes."
(Roland) Then she told her tale of vengeance and I hung on ev'ry word
for the odds of us both being killers seemed wholly absurd.
And in that moment I knew we could be like Bonnie and Clyde
so i described to Mathilda the reason I killed my wife:
"I promised her I'd love her and only her for all her life,
and I did until I came home early on that fateful night
when I caught her in the kitchen cheating on me with some clown,
so I pulled my pistol, shot 'em both and stuck them in the ground."
(guitar solo)
(both) Once we knew each other's stories, we immediat'ly embraced.
(Mathilda) I could smell gunsmoke in his hair. (Roland) I could taste blood on her face.
(both) And we realized that us failing in love could end up in death
So we wrote a contract on a napkin, this is what it read:
You must promise that you'll love me, only me for all your life
and I'll never have to stab your heart or shoot you in the eye.
If I ever catch you cheating on me with some other trick
I will take a chainsaw, chop you up and feed you to the pigs.
